Funny Jokes Corner

Saturday, February 3, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 2nd February, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 2nd February, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Massage
-------------------------

I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab. I grabbed a card on my way in. It was an ad for a girl calling herself Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs all the way up. You know the kind. So I'm in my room and figure, what the heck, I'll give her a call.
"Hello?" the woman says. Wow! she sounded sexy.

"Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is $ex. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it. Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night; Tie me up, wear a strap on, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything you want baby. Now, how does that sound?"

She says, "That sounds fantastic,...... but for an outside line Sir, you need to press 9."




-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180202

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Thursday, February 1, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 31st January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 31st January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Rider
-------------------------

After a round of golf, four ladies sat around the club house, chatting.

Seeing the ladies, the Pro approached them and asked: "How did your game go?

The first lady, a brunette, said she had a good round ... making the comment that she actually had 25 riders.
The Pro was a bit perplexed not knowing what a "Rider" was.

The second was a blonde lady who quickly chimed in and said that she had a very good round as well with 16 riders.

The third lady then said that her round was average and that she only had 10 riders.

The fourth lady admitted that she played the worst round of the day and that she only had 2 riders all day long.

The Pro was completely confused not knowing what the term "rider" meant. But, because he didn't want to look dumb, he made a quick polite remark, wished the ladies well and then left.

He then approached the bartender and asked "Hey, can you tell me what these ladies are talking about when they refer to "Riders"?"

The bartender simply smiled and said..."A 'Rider" is when you hit a shot long enough to ride on the golf cart to your ball.





-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180131

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 30th January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 30th January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Good Advice from Maxine
-------------------------

People who live in glass houses should make love in the basement.

Never read the fine print. There ain't no way you're going to like it.

If you let a smile be your umbrella, then most likely your butt will get soaking wet.

The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinate and attend funerals.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

To err is human, to forgive - highly unlikely.

Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?

Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than in a Hyundai.

Drinking makes some husbands see double and feel single.

Living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.

After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead.




-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180130

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 27th January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 27th January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Car Accident
-------------------------

I rear- ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car.

You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Well, i couldnt believe it... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!!!"

So, I looked down at him and said, " Well, then which one are you?"

And then the fight started.....








-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180127

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Friday, January 26, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 25th January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 25th January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Doctor Visit
-------------------------

"I'm sorry doctor, I know this is unusual but I seem to have a lettuce stuck in my bottom!"

"Good grief" the doctor replies "I'd better take a look"

"It's worse than that" the doctor says after the examination - "thats just the tip of the iceberg"




-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180125

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Monday, January 22, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 21st January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 21st January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Garbage Bags
-------------------------

A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large plastic
garbage bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately,
There is a rip in one of the bags,and every once in a while a $20 bill
Falls out onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her. 'Ma'am, there are
$20 bills falling out of your bag.'

"Oh, really? Damn!' says the little old lady.
I'd better go back and see if I can collect them. Thanks for the
warning.'

'Well, now, not so fast,' says the cop. 'How did you
Get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?'

'Oh no,' says the little old lady. 'You see, my back
Yard is right next to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time
there is a game, a lot of the fans come and pee through the bushes, right
Into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big
Hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingie through
the Bushes, I say, '$20 or off it comes!'

'Well, that seems only fair,' laughs the cop. 'Ok, good
Luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?'

'Well,' says the little old lady, 'not everybody Pays.




-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180121

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - 20th January, 2018

JokesWareHouse.com Joke of the day - 20th January, 2018 - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

-------------------------
Kiss and Slap
-------------------------

A young Technician and his General Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother.

After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young tech are interested in each other, because they are giving each other looks.

Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of a kiss followed by the sound of a slap. When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word.

The grandmother is thinking to herself, "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him."

The General manager is setting there thinking, "I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped and hit me!"

The young woman was sitting and thinking, "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but I wish my grandmother had not slapped him!"

The young tech sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself, "Life is good. How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his General manager all at the same time!"







-------------------------
Advertisements
-------------------------


Forward this joke to your friends! Or if you want to let them see this, give them this link: http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/cgi-bin/viewjoke.cgi?id=20180120

Jokes Warehouse Joke of the Day - http://www.jokeswarehouse.com

________________________________________________
To manage your account or to unsubscribe to our mailing list, go to http://www.jokeswarehouse.com/mailinglist.shtml